The Christians

Zack: No alcohol after 10? What are they, Christian or something?

Joel: More like gay...gay Christian.

The Departure

Jason: I'm heading home.

Joel: Get out of here.

The Painting

Joel: We need a painting. A big one. If we could somehow get a painting of a tiger with a big red background, we would be set.

The Remote

Joel: (Looks at remote) I don't want this. (Chucks remote at Danny and Zack's heads with no warning)

The Lock

Joel: (locks the door) No one leaves.

The Invitation

Joel: I go to Zankou at least once a week.

Zack: And never invite me.

Joel: You never ask to go.

The Thumb Tacks

Joel: Here's how it's going to go down. I'm bringing home four thumb tacks, two blue and two green, and we'll pick thumb tacks to see who gets which room.

Danny: Why can't we just flip a coin?

Joel: This is more even.